Wednesday 3 March 2010

Pieces of Me

I'm a friendly person. I love to laugh, I have 'in' jokes with my friends. I'm the most immature person I know, I'm a child trapped inside a (young) adults body. I have Peter Pan Syndrome and I never want to grow up. I want to stay at that age where you can explore, and laugh at the top of your lungs and its acceptable. I want to stay at that point where nothing matters, not really, because all that you really care about, is life. Exploring, having adventures, laughing til you pee, play fights. Innocence.

But as young and childish as I am I am also very wise. I am wise beyond my years, I've seen things people my age shouldn't see, shouldn't experience. I am the shoulder to cry on, just as much as I am the one crying on the shoulder. I know about things, not worldly things, not history or money or business. But I know about life. I understand people. I guess part of it comes from being an actress. I like to unravel a story, understand.

But the thing I am the most, above childish, above immature, above grown up, above wise, above anything, is naive.

I live by the belief that I've had enough crappy dates, enough cheating boys, enough lies, enough pain, enough heartache. I believe that maybe it is finally my turn. To love, to laugh, to dance, to be happy. To be safe and secure, to be loved in return. I listen to love songs and await the day they belong to me. Because one day they will.

How very naive of me.

So I set myself up for more pain, for more heartache, for more boys who are truly unworthy of me. But I'd rather do that than be alone. You have to fight for what you believe in, and I believe in this. I believe that one day I will find my Prince Charming. That I will be happy, and loved, and safe and secure.

On a Monday, I am waiting
Tuesday, I am fading
And by Wednesday, I can't sleep
Then the phone rings, I hear you
And the darkness is a clear view
Cause you've come to rescue me

Fall... With you, I fall so fast
I can hardly catch my breath, I hope it lasts

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