Friday, 31 December 2010

My 2010

It is only after reading back the blogs of the last year that I realise just how emotional it has been. I started it still getting over the pain of finding out I had been cheated on. The Christmas break at home I had spent mostly crying, the new years I had spent with my lifers.

January saw me creating my list of 100 things to do before I die. Some of them I had already achieved upon creating it, others I have achieved since, and some spaces are still left blank. It saw the end of one semester and the start of another, a new group of class mates as all of my best friends has been put in another class. It saw me reunited with old friends and it was probably the most messed up my head has been in a long time. Too many thoughts to process, too many emotions to deal with, too much feeling lonely and too much wishing for someone to take it away for me rather than doing it for myself.

How glad I am that I am past that now.

The year began to pick up during February when I had my 21st and a half birthday and I finally, for one night only, got to be a mermaid. As usual I crushed on several people, longing for someone to come and undo all the wrong that I was left with the previous December. That is a scene that played a lot the beginning of this year. And March finally brought the person I had been waiting for. How quickly it ended leaving me even more hurt than anything that had gone before.

To put pressure like that on to someone, to expect them to undo things that can never really be undone, to want and to wish them to be the perfect model who makes everything in your life suddenly fall into place is the most selfish act a person can ever make. This year I was guilty of that at least.

For me May was the most colourful month, painted with a thousand shades of black, but also with a million bright colours cleverly mixed in. It was the month of the big show, this year it was Zombie Prom. It was the month of the after show party and it was the month of the summer ball, where we spend silly amounts of money on dresses and shoes and make up and accessories to spend an entire day and night in the appropriately named student union bar The Dive. It is a day where you drink from dawn until dusk and shave your legs while drunk. It is the day you have photos of the girls in the kitchen "where they belong" and the boys in the garden with Nick Clegg. It is a day spent on cheap crappy fair rides that couldn't be any more fun if they tried and it is a night spent with your best friends dancing in shoes you can't walk in on a floor you can't not stick to. It is the best day of the uni year and it is what started off the my summer 2010.

A week in Brighton, an album, three weeks in London with seven truly amazing people, a show with a cast of 400+, trains and tubes, shopping and sun burning, trampolining in the rain and BBQs in the oven. Making sandwiches for seven people at 6.30am, sitting on the grass eating them at 1pm, tents flooding and mice making the director use you as a human shield. Crashing halls on the last night, the scary American security guard, back cracking and drinking wine from the bottle in 1st class on the way home and the many, many appearances of Percy the Gay Owl (Meow).

And then comes the beginning of the last chapter of my life at uni. A ten bedroom house with eight amazing house mates, a job with a theatre in education company, letting go and forgiving all the boys of the last year and finally being content in my own skin. It is the happiest I have been in a long time. Perhaps ever.

Of course there are still the down times. The stress of the third year of uni finally kicking in, the most stressful module to date and my Mom suffering a stroke at the age of 51.

It is a phone call I shall never forget, and an image that will haunt me for life, but having her home and well for Christmas has been the best gift I could ever receive.

To think you could lose a parent puts a lot of things into perspective so I start 2011 positivity, with my lifers and my house mates, I start it ready to cross off even more things from my list of 100 things to do before I die, I start it content and not wishing on someone to come and make everything right, because right now, this is as right as life has ever been.

Thank you 2010 <3

Thursday, 30 December 2010

time for a good bit of change

it may be a few days early but i've been thinking about my new years resolutions the last few days so i thought i should write them all down.
for anyone who reads my blog you will probably have come to notice that i am full of good intentions such as learning sign language, or swimming at least once a week but that i never blog about them again, technically meaning that apart from my initial blog it never went any further.
for this reason my new years resolutions are going to be one's i can actually see me doing.
so here goes...

1) Be organised with work. Timetable my time accordingly and spend a good deal of time on my dissertation.
2) Finish the last two Harry Potter books. (I still don't know what happens so shush!)
3) Find some sparkly converse for Sam's wedding.
4) Lose some weight and tone up in time for the wedding, remember I am going to be standing next to Adele wearing the same dress.. People will judge!
5) Get my sleep pattern back. Going to bed at 5am and waking up at 3pm is not good for anyone, even if I am a student.

i think for now at least that this is a far as my resolutions go. i shall try and keep them updated :)

Wednesday, 29 December 2010

remember remember

it is the time for reminiscing, for making plans that will never happen, for talking about what could have been and for trying to recreate moments of old. it is the last time we will get to do these things so freely. the last chance to stay up all night talking, to sleep in all day with no real care in the world. it is the last time we can all be together like this without any other obligations. the 'real world' won't come calling for another 5 months, those 5 months will be over in the blink of an eye so we should be so careful not to waste them.
lets not step on eggshells for fear of bringing to surface an old wound, lets just enjoy it. we have the rest of forever to get heartbroken, to fall in love, to work and to not have time. this is not the time for that. so lets not.

Sunday, 19 December 2010

flowers may fall

there is a boy, as there always is. he is a boy who i have liked for a long time, for far too long than i care to remember. he is a boy who has been there with me through the hard times, and who has been with me through the good times. we have shared the laughs and we have shared the tears.
but nothing is ever that easy.

sometimes i wonder what i am doing here. but then it is times like these that make me remember that even if i don't come out of this in the way i would prefer, that i have gained so so much more than anything i had ever imagined.

these are the days that will shape me. that will set the course for the way i am intended to spend the rest of my days. and one day soon, i still believe that my life will fall nicely into place.
even if it is not the way i had imagined.

Saturday, 18 December 2010

Not tonight, but soon. Soon things will fall in to place.

Thursday, 9 December 2010

I'm Not Too Sure..

And so the nights do pass us
As the stars shine and shine
Looking down on the distant world
The clock begins to chime

The feet of many people
Pass us as we walk
We ignore the rhythmic sounds they make
And silently we talk

Words fail to come to much
A blunder of sounds
Creating a deafening din
No ears listen now

The days and nights pass us
The sun sets and the moon falls
And still we fail to notice
All of what we cause

Thursday, 25 November 2010

'Til the world stops turning

I will love you ‘til the world stops turning
Till the moon breaks open and the sun stops shinning
I will love you ‘til the last of days
But these are three heartfelt words I will never say

Your face will mark the lines of perfection
Your lips will tease me with their sweet temptation
Your voice will travel to my very core
But you shall never see how far you make me fall

Until the last of days
Until the day I find the words
Until the world tips on its head
And our dreams are put to bed

I will love you ‘til the world stops turning

Saturday, 23 October 2010

I'm glad i have this head of mine

I hate growing up, it is not something i intend on doing, everyone knows this.
But sometimes life throws at you situations where you need to grow up slightly.
Moments where you need to be wise.
Moments where you need to look after others, because you know they can't do it themselves just yet.
And it is in these times that I am glad I have this head of mine on my sometimes grown up shoulders.

Tuesday, 19 October 2010

Sometimes it's just one of those days..

That start out pretty normal, nothing to complain about. Then you go into town, asking strangers what their perfect woman is and you meet a completely lovely guy who, with just the right amount of cheeky confidence says, "She has to have ginger hair, glasses and a lip ring" Which of course makes you blush and lost for any other words except for "Thank you" and "Goodbye".

So naturally you stumble away with a mass amount of butterflies in your stomach while your friends laugh at you for how red you went when he described you as his perfect woman. Then you go home and you spend the rest of the day retelling the story to all of your friends about your major fail in life and how you completely lost the ability to flirt during that one vital moment when you really needed to, and now you know that there is no hope of ever seeing the boy with slightly over sized eyebrows but a perfectly cute smile who was shopping for an underwater camera upon the event of the two of you meeting and you spend the remainder of the evening sulking.

And then for whatever reason or series of events, something unexpected decides to creep upon you and change your entire mood for the rest of the night. Leaving you at 11o'clock in the evening sitting on your house mates floor pretending not to cry while he puts on Pretty Woman and pretends to believe you when you say that you are okay and feeds you blueberry millions instead to try and cheer you up.

Sometimes, it's just one of those days...

Friday, 15 October 2010

Just because I love this song

Mom and dad they quite don't understand it,
All the kids they laugh as if they planned it
Why do girls wanna pierce their nose,
And walk around in torn pantyhose, oh yeah

I like the ones who say they listen to the punk rock
I like the kids who fight against how they were brought up
They hate the trends and think it's fucked to care,
It's cool when they piss people off with what they wear, oh yeah

So give me one good reason,
Why we need to be like them
Kids will have fun and offend
They don't want to and don't fit in

Hate the jocks, the preps, the hippie-fuckin scumbags
Heavy metalers with their awful, pussy hair bands
Counting seconds until we can get away,
Ditchin' school almost every single day, oh yeah

So give me one good reason,
why we need to be like them
Kids will have fun and offend
They don't want to and don't fit in

Sunday, 10 October 2010

The Perfect Woman

As part of one of my modules this semester at uni we work in groups to form a theatre company, which at the end of the module will put on a performance. My group are looking into the idea of the perfect woman, started by the original idea of mannequins.

After discussing what we would personally describe as the perfect woman we have decided to ask others what they think. No matter of your age, gender or nationality let me know your idea of the perfect woman and any other thoughts or comments you may have on this matter. I shall try and keep this updated of what people have said and on how our group are getting on with the creation of our performance!

The perfect woman?

Sunday, 3 October 2010

I Have

I Have

I have always been a lover of everything Mother Nature has provided us with.
I have always been fascinated with the sheer extent to which the animal world stretches.
I have always been an adventurer of my surroundings.

I have always wanted to fly.
I have always wanted to run.
I have always wanted to swim.

I have always wanted to feel the shore approach my naked feet.
I have always wanted to stand knee deep in the ocean under a crisp warm horizon.
I have always wanted to glide through the water like the fictional silhouette of a mermaid.

I have always believed that nothing is impossible.
I have always believed that dreams can come true.
I have always believed that you should be careful what you wish for.

I have had my dreams become a reality.
I have swum in the deepest oceans.
I have glided with immaculate beauty alongside Mother Natures most glorious of creatures.

I have begun to tire.
I have begun to feel weak.
I have begun to lose consciousness.

I have lost my snorkel and begun to panic.
I have been hit by a repetition of waves.
I have felt the water fill my lungs.

I have screamed out for help and had no strength to voice it.
I have waved for attention with no ability to stretch my arm from beneath the swallowing waters.
I have kicked my feet to keep me treading water and lost the will to carry on.

I have been noticed at the last moment.
I have been pulled from the water by my hair.
I have been given mouth to mouth and awoken.

I have deposited back to the ocean what it forcefully invaded my lungs with.
I have sat shivering on a boat awaiting my return to shore.
I have vacated the host of my most memorable adventure.

I have learnt what it is to respect my surroundings.
I have learnt what it is to live.
I have learnt what it is to die and survive.

Friday, 1 October 2010

Time of my life

Yes I've had the time of my life, and I owe it all to you <3

Living in 61 is truly amazing. I get to live with my best friends and am getting to know people better who I have never really spent much time with before. We drink an unhealthy amount of both alcohol and tea and we live off Super Noodles and toast. We - absolutely do not - steal traffic cones and street signs, and we play music all the live long day. We have snow fights inside in October and we are basically just amazing.

This is going to be the most fun, most amazing and most hard working year to date. And I am going to love every minute of it, just as I already have so far.

Thank you 61 and all the people who have and are yet to visit, 'The Garden'

Wednesday, 1 September 2010


An update on my 100 Things to do list...

Things I want to achieve in my life before I die, no matter how small and insignificant they may seem to someone else, they mean something to me. Lets see how this goes...

1. Surprise myself of my abilities
May 2008. Women of Troy. Stourbridge College final performance.
2. Swim in the sea
3. Perform on Broadway and/or The West End
4. Go to see a show in London
August 2008. Avenue Q, Woman in Black & Sister Act.
5. Get to the top of Snowdon, Wales
6. Go back to Egypt
7. Volunteer in a 3rd world country/world disaster
8. Have a positive impact on someones life
I mark this one a different colour because although it is something I know I have already achieved it is still something I want to carry on achieving.
9. Start swimming regularly
10. Move out of home
June/Sept 2009. I moved to Worcester where I go to uni.
11. Learn to drive
12. Go ice skating
13. Learn about the world, history, current affairs etc.
14. Record an album
Aug 2010. Tom RDD - The City Limits.
15. Write and record/sell my own song
16. Record and air my radio play
17. Perform in a full mask performance
Sept 2009. Vamos Theatre. 'Bed Baths & Bandages'
18. Open up my own (affordable) drama school
19. Learn guitar
20. Learn piano
21. Be part of a band and play a gig
22. Be in a film
2009. Expressive Arts Productions. 'Musik'. Shannon Knox.
23. Spend a night in a cell
24. Send a message in a bottle
25. Get a lift in a police car
April 2006. BP petrol station, Stourbridge - Stourbridge bus station. Avoiding chavs who had just beaten up my friends.
26. Hit someone over the head with a 'bottle' - movie style
27. Jump through a glass window - movie style
28. Write a book
29. Give modeling a shot
30. Get dreadlocks
31. Travel
32. Point randomly at a map and go to that place
33. Get my lip pierced
May 2010. Emily's Dangly Bits, Stourbridge.
34. Get my septum pierced
35. Learn another language
36. Sing on the tube and get people to join in
Aug 2009. National Youth Theatre Course 21. Returning from seeing Woman in Black.
37. Busk in the tube station
38. Give blood
39. Dye my hair GINGER
40. Spend a night in a hotel
41. Eat chicken
July 2010. Started eating chicken for the first time in 14 years.
42. Eat meat. Steak style!
43. Go scuba diving
44. Have a fake hen party
47. Get a degree
50. Give a stranger my number on a piece of paper
2008. On the train home. He never called.
52. Read the dictionary
53. Shave my head
54. Go to Scotland
55. Kiss in the pouring rain
56. Touch a mans nipple
2009. Merry Hill car park. AJ.
58. Run a marathon
60. Drive to the seaside, sleep in the car, come home
62. Learn to skateboard
63. Learn to rollerblade
66. Get over my fear and dislike for this number
67. Go to Ireland
69. Knit a jumper
71. Go rock climbing
73. Learn, or at least attempt, to surf
74. Go paint balling - 10 Things I Hate About You style
77. Go to the Monday Mystery Movie at Odeon
80. Have children
81. Have my own pet
83. Create my own cocktail
85. Stand behind a waterfall
86. Sing at an important/special event
87. Dress up as a mermaid
2010. My 21st and a half birthday.
91. Own my own house
95. Go busking
May 2010. Worcester Town Centre. Me & Tom.
Aug 2010. Burgess Hill Town Centre. Me, Tom & Steve.
Die on stage
100. Be buried at sea

Tuesday, 31 August 2010

By Popular Demand

Tomorrow I move into my new house. The house I will share with some of my closest friends. The house that will see me through my final year of uni. It is the house I was supposed to be sharing with the boy. Months before even thinking of packing my things to move in to the house, before even packing up my belongings to move out of 'The Bungabow', I was dreading living here. Scared to live with the boy when the boy was no longer my boy.

I cried for months, literally. Unable to think about anything other than facing living with a person I still had such strong feelings for. Made that much harder by knowing that he didn't feel the same. Knowing that I had lost one of my best friends, not only my boyfriend.

I moved out of 'The Bungabow' where so many memories belonged, back home, to my safe place. The place where he had no marker. Where he had never been. The place that was truly mine.
I logged on Facebook and felt my safe place slowly fade away. He had been there, visiting another friend. They had been to the shopping centre just streets away from my house, they had been to my friends work, got drunk, hung out. He now had his mark there too.

I went to Brighton to visit my best friend, the one who has been there for me quite possibly more than anyone else I know, and he had been there too. He had his memories there and I had mine. Separate of course, but all the same, they were there.

So I went to London, did a show. Met some amazing funny caring beautiful people and still all I could think and worry and cry about is how on earth I was going to cope, spending my last year of uni living with the-no-longer-boy.

Then I got a text that quite literally has changed everything.

The boy is no longer moving in, he got asked to live with some friends he hasn't had as much time seeing over the second year, so he thought he'd take this last opportunity to rebuild those friendships, spend the final year with them.

Some of my other house mates were livid, some took the news quite well. As for me, I cried. It was selfish, but I was angry. Angry that I had wasted three months of my summer crying over a problem that no longer existed. Angry that I had wasted all that happy time, not being happy. I was angry at myself for not being concerned about how this could affect our own contracts come September. I was angry at him for not rising to my want of an argument when I text him about it. I was angry when I finally read the Facebook message that told his nine friends he wasn't going to live in the epic house that is 61. And then I was angry at my friend who told me to grow and pair and get over it.

But I did get over it. I sat down and I thought about it. I talked to my friends in London about it, people who had no idea who this boy was or why I had found him so special. People who would look in, truly, completely, honestly, from the outside.

It was during these talks that I realised that I was over it. All of it. The breakup, the pain, the crying, the worrying, the friendships gained and lost. That I had maybe been over it a longer than I thought I had.

I had spent so much time worrying about what might be that I had missed out on three months of what was.

So tomorrow marks the day that I move in to the house that will see me through my final year of uni. The house which already has had its own little emotional roller coaster. The house which I cannot wait to move in to, to explore, to make new memories in. And most importantly, to laugh in.

I told my friend last night that as happy as I finally am, I do wonder what I am supposed to do with all this spare time on my hands. For the first time in about two years my mind isn't occupied worrying about some boy, some new heartache, some new way in which I've been wronged. And as lovely and incredible as it is, I do often wonder what I used to think about and talk about before the screw ups to the human race made an appearance in my life.

I guess I'm about to find out <3

Tuesday, 17 August 2010

Guess who's back

Sometimes, after all the shit life throws at you, you find that happy place that you have read about in books ever since you were little, that you have seen countless times in films, that you have dreamt about every night that you have managed to escape the nightmares and you have been promised actually does exist by every friend you have ever self-pityingly shared your problems with. And when you find that place, it is much much more beautiful than you ever could have imagined. I am quite honestly, completely, gratefully and thankfully the most content I have been in years. Bring on the rest of 2010.. I'm ready, waiting and smiling like Santa on Christmas morning while drinking his morning cup of tea :)

Saturday, 14 August 2010

sometimes the most selfish of things can be the best way out
the end x

Sunday, 1 August 2010

It's that time again

I am currently sipping tea in the room of one of my bestest friends after a week of invading his house, eating his food and drinking his drink. It has been an amazing week.

And while I sip this tea that his Dad has so kindly made me in an actual teapot I wait the departure time of my train. The train which will move me on from my week in Burgess Hill and onto my three weeks in Battersea Park, sleeping on the floor with ten of the most wonderful, kind and talented people I have ever know, most of whom I have not seen for a year.

I met these amazing people a year ago while I spent two weeks in Greenwich working at Laban Dance Studios with National Youth Theatre. They made my summer last year and I am sure they will, once again, make this one.

We are going to be spending three very busy busy weeks devising, rehearsing and performing as part of NYTs summer season, in what is going to be their most ambitious production to date. It is called S'Warm and looks into Einstein's theory of the death of the Bea equalling the death of the planet and will involve 500 NYT members.

As far as I am aware my small group of friends from Summer Course 2009 - Course 21, will mostly be there, sleeping on the floor of probably the most generous person I know.

This summer has already been amazing, recording in the studio with my best friend on his solo album, and now I get to do this too. I cannot wait for this summer to commence!

[21] <3

Wednesday, 21 July 2010

Forget regret or life is yours to miss

Sunday, 18 July 2010

This Aint A Love Song

Chasing Shallow Dreams

I would love to do a cover of this song

Saturday, 17 July 2010

I love this song <3

"I didn't know Mexicans were brown.."

This is a very delayed blog about the night I went to see Ska band [Spunge]

I had bought my brother the tickets for his 20th birthday, he had asked me to go with him, partly because we're cool like that, also because it would cross off a few things from Nathan's Play List.

The gig was at the O2 in Birmingham, somewhere I had never been before. It was held in the upstairs room which was probably the size of half a football field.

As with all gigs there were some warm up bands. The first were called The Rimes and from their performance I'm guessing they haven't been doing it very long. Watching them was a bit of a disappointment from a performative point of view as they did nothing. The lead singer really got into the music but just looked like a bit of a tard as the other guitarists were stiff as boards and the drummer you couldn't really see.

From a music point of view they played really well and the lead guitarist had a few solos which were shocking to see come from the fingers of such a bored looking boy - who btw, wore such tight jeans i was trying to figure out where his You-Know went as i could not see any room for such a genital! Maybe that's why he looked so stiff - no pun intended - he just simply couldn't move due to his ridiculously tight jeans!

The second band were far better.. Their set up took a while, and I found watching the lead singer trying to hang fairy lights around his mic stand rather amusing, yet a pretty touch. This band were from California - I think - and were called ORANGE.

Instantly they were better than The Rimes.. They were have FUN! And you could see it, and it made you have fun too. At times the music drown out the words and you only caught little bits, but the fact they carried on and engaged with the audience really made it make up for that.

During their first song the lead singer, Joe Dexter, pushed lead guitarist, Alex Gomez's, mic stand off the stage, which started the banter which flowed from then on through their set. For two songs, guitarist Perry Ladish, took control of the mic bringing a completely different sound to that of the previous of their set. They did a Beatles cover, after which Perry said, "Did you like that one? I wrote it last night."

Unlike the first band, ORANGE spoke to each other and to their audience, and it was quite amusing hearing Americans trying to say 'Birmingham'. The banter between them contined with Zak and Joe both trying to speak at the same time, which eventually led to Zak saying, 'That's what happens when you invited Mexicans in to play. We take over. Fucking brown people!" They were so light hearted about everything.

After finishing their set [Spunge] were welcomed to the stage. After watching ORANGE who were a bit heavier than what I had expected I didn't really know what to expect next - I had only ever heard about four [Spunge] songs.

My brother and I had managed to get right to the front of the barrier and were as close as humanly possible. The band walked on to stage and wow did the room alight even more than they already were. You could feel the total atmosphere change and become even more alive. It was amazing before it had even begun.

After their first song, lead singer said, "Thank you. You are by far the best audience we have had so far. We're now half way through our tour!" Everyone, naturally cheered and he continued with, "This is the second night of our tour."

Even though I did not know many of their songs, if any at all, I still had a brilliant time and found my self singing along to the chorus's. A few times I phoned my friend Tom who had been unable to come to see them to give him a taste of what he was missing, and I got a bit camera happy and took quite a few pictures - with the all banned flash on! (I shall add pictures to this blog soon!)

When it came to their last song, Kicking Pigeons, the room went crazy, and it continued even after they left the stage. The lights came up slightly and the room erupted with "We want more! We want more!" It got to the point where you really couldn't imagine them coming back on stage, and just as you thought people might give up the drummer walked back on stage.

"We never do encores."

Their return was just as amazing as the first time they walked on stage and once again people didn't want it to end. It was truly incredible. For the final time the guitarist jumped onto the speaker right above mine and Nathans heads and pulled faces while playing at us. It was like our very own show!

When they left the stage for the final time the room cleared quickly, I however decided to stay and see if anyone came out of the front to mingle. After all they had been asking all show where the best place was to go and drink afterwards, to which people shouted "here!"

My insistence paid off and although I didn't get to meet any of [Spunge] I did get to have a very lengthy conversation with Joe Dexter. Me and him are real tight now and are friends on Facebook. Booyar!

Eventually we were asked to leave the room while they got it ready for the evening event Propaganda, which was a bit of a ball ache as the lead singer of [Spunge] had just walked past us. But heyho, never mind.

All in all the evening was amazing.. It was really nice to go to a proper 'gig' apposed to the huge concert events I am used to. Knowing that the people on stage can actually see you is a real boost and makes the experience all that bit better and more exciting - which i suppose sucked a bit for the first band as they would have been able to see how bored everyone looked, but then so did they so never mind.

On our way out me and Nay grabbed some freebies from the ORANGE merch table, the one I was most excited about was the 'Free Shit' sign with an arrow, and on our way out of the room we met their drummer Zac Glosserman who sold Nay a CD for petrol money and we had a picture with him too.

[Spunge] is certainly a band I will listen to again and makes me want to listen to more of Nathan's Play List as it seems my brothers music isn't all that bad! ORANGE were a pleasure to watch and really woke up the crowd ready for [Spunge]. They were a breath of fresh air after being bored to tears by the seemingly just as bored first band The Rimes, who gave a perfect example of a band in their 'garage phase'. It's just a shame they didn't stay there!

Thursday, 15 July 2010

The Summer Calls...

- Visit best friend in Leicester. Check.
- Visit an old friend in Loughborough. Check.
- See old college tutor. Check.
- Spend a day or two in the sun. Check.
- Book Brighton/London tickets. Check.
- Buy a camera. Check.
- Buy [Spunge] tickets. Check.
- Buy Imogen Heap tickets. Check.
- Buy Paramore tickets. Check.
- Go to Brighton for a week.
- Go to London for three weeks.
- Spend time with the family.

I think this is going to be a rather splendid summer :)

Friday, 9 July 2010

Running Shoes

Running Shoes

Put me up on a pedestal why don’t you
Let me see the ground from way up here
Lift me up where the buildings reach to
So I can watch you worship me

Come scatter rose petals at my feet dear
And buy me presents everyday
Call me beautiful in the morning
Don’t let your faithfulness ever stray

It’s not that easy
It’s not that great
Being sat up here
My mind starts to frustrate

I don’t belong here
Where you’ve put me
You think too highly of me
My dear

Sit me comfortably on my velvet cushion
Feed me grapes from the great vineyard
Keep me cool with palm leafs blowing
While I’m locked up in your heart

Won’t you watch as the people pass me
Sat up here, without a trace
All the faces they blur and pass me
As I start to contemplate

It’s not that easy
It’s not that great
Being sat up here
My mind starts to frustrate

I don’t belong here
Where you’ve put me
You think too highly of me
My dear

I’m starting to get annoyed now
As my tower, it won’t unwind
I’d like to put my feet back on the ground now
Please stop stealing all my time

It’s not that easy

And it’s not that great
Being forced up here
My mind is really so frustrate

I’m getting restless
As I try to tear you down
Won’t you please just listen
To all the sounds around

Can you hear the mummer
Of my beating heart
Begging, asking, pleading
To go back to the start

Before you put me
All the way up here
Trying to protect me
From the world you so fear

I don’t need your hand
And I don’t need your help
I was doing fine without you
Till you shut, my world out

And this pedestal you built me
And put me way upon
I didn’t once deserve it
So lets leave that and move on

Because its not
Because its hard
Because its starting
To tear me apart

Because you’re driving me crazy
With your obsessive loving words
Just quit and slow down dear
And we’ll be closer to the start

Don’t chase me down, love
Don’t scare me away
Cause once I've got on my running shoes
You’ll never find me, again
You’ll never find me again