Sunday, 31 January 2010

Lessons in running

So today I was late for work. I completely over slept - well, not completely, I woke up before my shift started at least (by 10 minutes) - in my rush to get to work I missed my morning cup of tea and what a whole load of trouble it caused!

Today has definitely been one of those days!

My lesson: Don't ignore your alarm!!

In other news, yet I suppose still relating to the title of this post, tomorrow is the first day of the brand new semester. For single honours drama students the entire semester is mandatory and because of this our groups have been decided for us. They have split the year in two, with half of us in lectures at the beginning of the week and the other half at the end. When the groups first came available for us to see I was so pleased to find out that my group of four had been split equally, with two of us in one half and the other two in the second half. This meant none of us were going to be on our own and I think we were all really pleased with this.

However, things do not always stay as they are planned and my partner in crime requested to be moved to the other group, therefore leaving me on my own. She didn't tell me about this until a week ago, weeks after she had requested and been allowed to change groups, yet the other two already knew and no one told me.

It does not bother me that she wanted to change groups, fair play if she thinks she will work better with the other tutor, but it did hurt to find out weeks after she had decided to do it, and to find out over text.

I could quite easily go in tomorrow and request to be moved also and stay with my best friends, but I'm not going to. I think it is time to learn to run by myself with no one to hold me up. Instead of being down about being without any of my best friends in this module I am going to encourage it. I am going to get to work with people I have not yet worked with, and OK, some of them may not be the nicest of people or the best graded students on the course but I'll do it.

It almost feels like bowling without the gutters down. I might not get my perfect strike right away, but if I keep trying who knows what will happen. It's time to put down my comfort barriers that my friends represent and bowl on my own, without anything to bounce off. Who knows, I might surprise myself and get that strike we are all playing for, but if all I get are half strikes at least I'll know I tried.

My friends will always be there, just as the barriers in bowling always will, the option to have them there though is my own, and I think that this time I need to play alone.

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